Why did I do it ?

       Why had caused me to miss more than half of the ninth grade and about 2 months of school in tenth?  What had made me do the things I did? Why made me do it? I was sick of the fact that so much of the fact that so much of your life depends on how well you do as a teenager.  I was sick of the all the expectations that I was expected to meet.  Sick of all the pressures that were coming from home, from school, from society.  I was just sick of everything and everyone.  I felt as if everything was coming from me from all sides.  I was wanted to be left alone, take a break from reality.  I wanted to do my own thing and just have fun.  I didn't care about what would happen to me, I lived for the moment.  I was self destructive.  But then I eventually realized how badly it could end, I realized there's way to balance out things, there's a time for fun and a time for work. I came to the realization that I was becoming my own obstacle, that I'd have to get past myself to achieve my goals.  I'm still working on the whole balancing things out and doing good, but I'm in a much better place, and I'm certainly making my dreams into plans.